Single men are always wondering how to get the attention of women they'd like to meet. Many sites offer all sorts of "magic" pick-up lines or "secret" seduction techniques. They prey on the hopes of young guys (well, not always just young ones) who are often a bit shy and/or not necessarily blessed with model looks or a bodybuilder's physique. What if the answer were simpler?
As we were leaving I helped my wife off her chair (we were sitting at a high-top) and then helped her on with her coat. Melissa walked back over to us to tell us we looked "adorable." She said it's so rare to see couples treating each other the way my wife and I did.
It's always nice to get some reassurance that you're being noticed and appreciated. I am happily married for more than 23 years and plan for many more; yet it's still a great feeling when you can place a smile on the face of any woman. I've consistently seen this happen when practicing chivalry toward women I meet as well as when they see me being chivalrous with my wife.
Afterward I thought to myself 'how many of the young single men in this place would like to capture the attention of this young woman?' Or some other woman they'd like to meet?
- Open doors. This is the one that draws the most frequent comments on my twitter feed about chivalry. More than a few women have written that they find this "sexy."
- If you have a seat somewhere and you see a woman standing because there aren't any free seats available, offer to stand and give her yours. That goes for trains and buses, at a crowded bar etc.
- If you see a woman taking off her coat, or starting to leave and putting her coat on, offer to help her with it. I have definitely gotten a few smiles doing this.
- If you hear a woman say she's chilly, offer her your jacket. Outfits worn by some women may not keep them warm if the bar is a bit chilly and something that simple can make her evening a bit nicer. I did that recently at a conference where a number of us has gathered to keep the meeting going and when I offered my jacket when one of the women mentioned it was getting cold, she was able to relax and enjoy the rest of the discussions.
- Find something complimentary to say. You can chose something that is not provocative nor seem too forward. Talking about pretty eyes, a nice hair color or the color of a dress doesn't mean you are launching into a pick-up mode, it can be a simple gesture meant to make her feel appreciated just for being herself.
- Don't be crass, vulgar or offensive. Today's society is filled with music lyrics that call women some nasty things. I'll leave it up to you whether there's a place for that, but in most personal encounters, something crass will make a woman wonder what else is in your behavior.