When it comes to chivalry, the gestures themselves are not really that complicated nor difficult.  They are small rituals that don't generally involve a lot of strength, a lot of time.  Yet in the day-to-day rush we often find ourselves it can get easy to overlook one. I do it myself more frequently than I'd like and I remain focused on becoming more consistent.  So what's the key?
It's important to remember that the things on which you focus expand. That goes for areas such as wealth and abundance, good health and so on.   And it relates to the attitude and perception you bring to your choices of behavior.

An awareness of the circumstances around you and sensing opportunities for chivalry will likewise deepen how much impact it has for you.  Giving it a notch more attention will likely lead to a bit more frequency with ease, develop better habits and result in more times that someone notices what we're doing by offering it.
The public notice is important because you aren't just doing chivalry for yourself.  It also has a ripple effect onto those around you.  Young men of today are faced with role models that don't always send the best messages.  Imagine how helpful it could be for positive behavior to get seen more broadly to counter some of that negative the kids are facing.

Furthermore, by increasing your awareness to notice opportunities you can be supportive and helpful in chivalrous ways will also strengthen your awareness of opportunities to be of service in ways beyond chivalry.  That takes the practice of chivalry from a nice gesture into a state-of-being that can add to any gentleman's self esteem and the way he is perceived by others.

So make a pledge to take a quick pause every so often when you're on your way to or from work or heading out on a date and bring your awareness up.  Watch how easy it gets.
 


Comments

03/06/2015 4:52pm

"Taking chivalry from a gesture to a state of being."
John, it is with your support and gentle guidance that I paused this week and as a result created an opportunity for deeper connection with those around me AND connection with self.
Thanks for continuously inviting me into this conversation.

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03/06/2015 5:47pm

Thanks, Star. When push comes to shove, people are always looking for connection, and the more they can deepen the better the impact for everyone in that connection. I am grateful to have made a difference for you.

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03/07/2015 6:50am

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Diego
03/08/2015 7:21pm

I didn't win anything being gentleman
I'm not a slave women
equal rights!

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03/21/2016 3:05am

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04/21/2016 3:54am

I read your post. I must say that I am strongly agreed with your words. Nowadays we are always thinking about wealth and abundance and our good health but where are the others in our life. We never ever think about them.

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Angela
05/06/2016 10:08am

I notice living in the South that our young men tend to do these customs as matters of good upbringing and manners. I am teaching my three sons to show respect in chivalrous ways as a matter of everyday living not just an special event custom. Thanks for speaking out endorsing such respectful behavior.

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06/08/2016 1:07pm

It is doesn't mean that it become easy for all.

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04/12/2017 1:23am

good post

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04/13/2017 7:55am

I agree with you. Women appreciate small gestures from men. It's where they see if men are really serious to them. Chivalry requires less effort if you are really aware of what women want. A gentleman would always make an effort to know what are the qualities preferred by the women. Gender role is important to bring chivalry back to how it was used to be.

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